


Climb (to the lonely stars)

by LadyAsheofKirkwall



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-17 21:38:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9347405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAsheofKirkwall/pseuds/LadyAsheofKirkwall
Summary: If you had told Victor Nikiforov that reaching the top would be this lonely, he may have stopped climbing.





	

The thing about being at the top is that there is nowhere to go but down. And who wants to fall when they have climbed so long to be at the top? Who would not want to be where the air was thick with the light of the moon and filled with the glitter of stars? Those at the top become stars themselves, people from below looking up with the desire to reach out and touch the glittering beings above. Then of course, there were those who would want to reach higher, to find new and unexplored areas...

The other thing about being the top is that it is lonely. So many people lift you up, but then the strength you need to pull them beside you is exhausted on the focus of remaining at the top. They do not get to see the glitter of the stars up close, breathe in the air filled with moonlight. Then there are so many people you step on to climb, without even realizing it at moments, making their own climb harder. Those who make it to the top alongside you often strive to keep themselves there that they do not care to know the other stars that twinkle around them, save for necessity. It’s lonely and cold, and even when you speak with those around you at all levels, you still feel so very isolated.

* * *

If you had told Victor Nikiforov that reaching the top would be this lonely, he may have stopped climbing.

* * *

He had started skating because he loved it. His mama had been a skater, had danced on her blades so gracefully, long dark hair flowing around her while her costume sparkled like the Milky Way, and he had wanted to be beside her on the ice from the first moment his father took him to see her perform at a completion. So he began to skate with her, her soft voice coaching him on as his father stood rink-side, always watching them lovingly.

He remembered the first time his mother had showed him off to her friends, the joy in her eyes as she joked with them after he had skated, saying she was glad he only took after his father in looks and kindness, that he had gotten her grace and poise. His father had teased her back, and while Victor could no longer remember the exact words, he would never forget how happy they looked at that moment, how happy they still looked to this day when he made the rare visit.

“Vitya, darling, would you like to compete someday like your Mama?”

His eyes had gone wide when his father had said this, and he could still feel the joy that burst from his heart, grin stretching across his lips and he nodded.

“I want to!”

They had been the first step he took, the first set of hands pushing him up the mountain. He had seen the stars that danced around his mother when she skated, and he wanted to reach them himself.

* * *

At the age of seven, they found him a real coach. His mama’s leg had been aching her since she had fallen in the last Grand Prix Final, and she could no longer keep up with his quick moments, gliding across the ice as if he were made for it. As much as she wanted to keep cheering her son on and coaching him, he had known she was hurting herself by trying to show him new moves. He told his papa that, and after a few quiet days, his mama admitted that was truth. They began the search for his coach that very day.

The man they found had, according to his mother, once been a fierce competitor in the male division, though at the time Victor remembered looking at him and not seeing any of the grace and beauty he had become accustomed to in his time round other skaters. The man was gruff, though his eyes still sparkled when he watched Victor skate the same way they still did now when he had grown old and gray.

“You’re doing great, Vitya.”

The pride that had filled his heart warmed him at the time, had made his face flush.

“Thank you, Coach Yakov!”

That was the next pair of hands lifting him up as he truly began his climb. He could see it, see the air filled with the moonlight.

* * *

His teen years were full of practice, of medals and of praise. And, his need to be the center of attention. His fellow skaters often watched and waited as Yakov spent extra moments either scolding the “prince” of the ice or giving him extra praise.

More skaters quit those years than flourished, so drowned in the overwhelming wave that was Victor that they never got the chance to feel that rush of being the best, of having the spotlight on them. It wasn’t until years later that Victor realized why they quit, having just thought, when he was young and foolish, they were jealous of his skills or realized they would not live up to him.

“I think I might quit too…”

Smugness should not have filled his thoughts when the fifteen-year-old across from him spoke, but it had.

“Oh really? That is _such_ a shame…”

Those skaters he used as steps, knocking them down as he continued onward. He just had to reach the top, had to feel himself bathed in the glow of the celestial bodies that danced there.

* * *

He skated his heart out, having to get gold. He had promised his fans they would see him take it home. Twenty-five, he was the prince of ice-skating, the man everyone in the skating world knew and watched. He was so close to the top, he just had to reach a little farther…

“Victor Nikiforov has done it again! For the third year in a row he’s taken gold at the Grand Prix Finals, and not only that but he’s broken his own world record in the Free Skate!”

His fans cheered loudly, and as the gold hung around his neck, he finally knew he was among the stars. They danced and glittered all around him, and he could feel the moonlight making him glow. He had, after all his work, reached the top.

The fans’ cries gave him that last push, and there he stood. It was as beautiful as he imagined, twinkling galaxies before him, and he in that moment he thought he'd never want to lose that feeling.

* * *

Twenty-seven is a lonely age. He has worked so hard to reach the top, but shortly after reaching it the moonlight air and dancing stars have lost their appeal. He wished, oh how he wished, that he could have realized that, while many hands had helped him up, he has never taken the time to help them. That he has ruined the chances of so many other skaters by demanding Yakov’s attention. That he has never honestly thanked him or his parents for helping him get this far.

Five gold medals rest in his room, gathering dust. He has touched the stars, danced and basked in the glow of the moon, but he is so lonely, and the moon is so cold...

The idea of being at the top no longer holds what it used to, but he does not necessarily want to fall. His pride will not let him, especially knowing now how many people helped get him there. No, he just wants someone there with him, someone who he can climb even higher beside and reach new and unexplored heights.

Someone who can understand how lonely one can feel even when surrounded by so many people.

That person comes to him in the most unexpected of ways, a reappearance of someone who once made his lonely world feel less lonely, a man who seemed not to care he was not at the top yet still danced with stars not around him but radiating from his every fiber. A man so beautiful he seemed as if he were already of another world...

Seeing that man now, in a video before him that cries out an echo of his own loneliness, Victor realizes he’s found the one to climb with.

But first, he needs to offer him a hand. 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> It's past 1 am here, and I've had a lot of pain medicine for my migraine, but I couldn't get this idea out of my head so I wrote it up. I also just wanted to write something for YoI, since the show means a lot to me, and while there's another fic I'm working on for it that I plan to share when I've got it done, I figured that since I wrote this I might as well post it. I hope you liked it!
> 
> (When I feel better I'll probably end up taking this down because I'm sure it makes a lot less sense than I think it does lol or I'll add more maybe. Who knows?)


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